Why quantity of love matters more than similarity

The study, led by Kory Floyd at Washington State University and published in Communication Studies, surveyed 141 heterosexual couples from across the United States. The sample included a wide range of ages, ethnic backgrounds, and income levels. Instead of analyzing individuals in isolation, the researchers examined each couple as a unit.

Participants reported how often they expressed and received affection, including verbal praise, handholding, and supportive actions. They also rated their relationship quality on trust, intimacy, passion, and overall satisfaction.

Statistical analysis showed that people who expressed more affection tended to feel more satisfied themselves. In many cases, their warmth also improved their partner’s view of the relationship. Most importantly, the total amount of affection shared was a much stronger predictor of relationship quality than how similar partners were to each other.

In practical terms, a couple with one highly affectionate partner and one moderately affectionate partner reported better outcomes than a couple where both partners were equally reserved. Similarity did not harm relationships, but it did not provide the same boost as high overall warmth.

Co-author Colin Hesse from Oregon State University explained that the findings do not dismiss the value of similarity in relationships but highlight the specific power of affectionate communication.

The benefits may come from the stress-reducing effects of touch and positive words, which can buffer conflict and build goodwill. According to the researchers, affection tends to benefit both the person who gives it and the person who receives it.

There were a few exceptions. Feelings of love and commitment were not more strongly linked to total affection than to similarity between partners, suggesting these deeper bonds may follow different rules.

Earlier, Qazinform News Agency reported that noninvasive brain treatment shows promise for depression.